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The Secret To A Successful Negotiation Without Taking Anything Away From The Other Person

I always get asked about how to successfully negotiate without feeling like you’re taking advantage of the person you’re negotiating with.

Firstly, why is negotiating important?

Whether you realize it or not in business or in life you are always negotiating.

If you are a poor negotiator, you’ll spend a fortune.
If you are a good negotiator, you’ll save a fortune.
If you are a great negotiator, you’ll make a fortune.

Negotiation is a critical, critical skill.

Now, how do you negotiate a win-win situation?

How do you get what you want…without taking away what the other party wants?

For example, if someone wants to get more money, but I want to pay less, how do you make it work for both of us?

The problem that many people have is, they think that it's a zero sum game. They think, “There's one pie, so if I get fewer pieces, that means you get more.”

No. That is not how I teach the art of negotiation.

Instead of having a set amount of pieces in your pie—which inevitably leads to a feeling of scarcity—you just change the pie completely. Perhaps you now have an apple pie, cheesecake, chocolate donut… basically, whatever it is you both want.

Stick with me here—I’ll explain what I mean.

Have you ever heard the saying, “Different strokes for different folks?” This saying speaks to the fact that everyone values things differently, and everyone has different beliefs about what is important (or not).

The beauty is, this means everyone can get what they want—you just need to know what it is.

It’s true: when you negotiate, the most important thing is to find out what's important to the other party. You already know what's important to you—so no work is needed there.

Let me give you an example. Let's say, at your company, you're trying to pay less for a service or product. The party in question says they will charge $1,000. You say you just want to pay $700. So what’s the action there?

Just because you said you wanted $700 doesn’t mean they have to give it to you. This is why you need to have a rationale. So instead, in your discussion, you might find out that they were burnt last time by a company that they gave 60 days credit to and—they didn't get paid. Perhaps they've been burnt several times.

This is where you need to think laterally.

Instead of simply focusing on closing the price gap, you could arrange to pay the $700 immediately, as opposed to in 30 or 60 days as is standard—thereby benefitting them with a speedy payment, while still paying a lower price.

See, that's what they want. You give them what they want, they give you what you want. It's not about taking anything away from them (or from you).

The point is, you just need to provide them with the value they’re looking for.

It's about being creative and adding to both your lives, instead of minus-ing. If you do, you will make—and save—a lot of money.

Simply by asking some questions first and finding out what is good for the other party, you can easily create a win-win situation for everyone involved.

How do you practice negotiation? Do you have advice for reaching a win-win outcome? Share your experiences and thoughts in the comments below!

Along with negotiation, there are 6 specific principles that I believe are the difference between getting rich and staying middle class or broke.

I reveal each of these 6 principles in my web class, Zero To MultiMillionaire.

I’d be honored if you were my guest on my next class.

Click here to reserve your (free) seat now.

For Your Freedom,


Join the Discussion Below

15 thoughts on “The Secret To A Successful Negotiation Without Taking Anything Away From The Other Person”

  1. Maria says:

    hi, Mr. Harv! you are an absolutely amazing author and person!!! Greateful to you !!!!

  2. Love this idea! I’m always talking about the win-win on my happy, healthy and hot website. I look for finding the win-win in everything…not just negotiation. For example, taking my dog for a walk on a gorgeous day is a win-win…he is so happy, and I am exercising my body and typically getting lots of creative inspiration at the same time. Buying grass fed beef from a local farmer is a total win-win. I’m supporting a local business that is treating animals ethically, and I’m nourishing my body with the highest quality food. Love the idea of abundance vs. scarcity mentality. It is so different from the ideas most of us grew up with, but can really change the way you look at things.

    1. Michael says:

      That’s not a win for the cow

      1. Kelly says:

        Sure it is in order to sustain life in all forms something dies and is transformed into another source for energy. Life and death are united in the purpose of existence. There isn’t one without the other. Be in disagreement with reality miserable and confused. Be in agreement and accept it, happy and at peace in the moment.

  3. I have found that transparency is key in a negotiation. Even if the other party does not want to be, they see that you are and they open up. Humans innocently operate from a place of domination, manipulation and control. When you can release that and operate from heart and just be open, it will result in a win-win situation.

  4. Azeem says:

    actually I am a born negotiator and i have been using my own negotiating tactic to get things done throughout ,

    I offer value and long term business opportunity as a key to my negotiation and also opt for certain gaps to be closed through a barter or leaving out things which i do not need which helps me build customised and target products at a reduced price.

    1. Gibran says:

      Long term business opportunity? Could you please give me an example

  5. Thanks Harv. There should be no winners and no losers in any negotiation. As a Civil Debt Settlement Negotiator it is my job to consider all sides and come to an honest and reasonable settlement that both parties will be satisfied with. My favorite question is, “What would the judge say?” In every deal there is negotiation and that’s part of the fun in business.

  6. I’ve been doing a lot of research these days on spirituality, mindsets and business, a lot of it always comes back to three things.

    What is the energy you are focusing on? – this is your mindset powering your world.
    Are you being authentically you and genuine by giving value?
    Are you nurturing your soul by finding the balance between giving and valuing customers back?

    Excellent advice my friend 😀


  7. Miriam says:

    Hi Harv! If a company want $1,000 in 30 or 60 days and I offer to pay $700, it is best to pay the $700 upfront. When you find our that thy were burnt last time by a company, the best thing is to offer to pay upfront. The money being in their bank account will benefit them.
    I heard a story of two women who give birth to a baby. They were both living in the same house at the time. One gave birth three days before the other, and during the night, oneof the woman sleep on her baby and killed it; she took her dead baby and put it in the bed of the other woman and took the other woman live baby. When the other woman awoke she saw that the baby in her bed was not hers. During a court hearing, the judge wanted to cut the live baby in half and give each of the women half. The woman who killed her baby agree to the judge decision, but the other woman said no, give her the baby. What was the decision? The judge gave the baby to the woman who would rather give her baby away than to have it killed. One value lesson here. One value life and the other did not. One wanted life and one did not. It is what you want and value that counts.

    1. Kelly says:

      Hi that so called story is in fact from the Bible. It was not a judge, it was the insight and understanding of a wise king. It’s a good read in many ways. Thanks for sharing. Peace and blessings to you and yours.

      1. Sido says:

        That was a story long before the bible was written and the credit given to King Solomon therein…

    2. The judge was King Salamon in the bible.

  8. In my business I call this kind of negotiation “developing a game-changer” with your client…. and the rest will dissolve:-)

  9. Virginia Reeves says:

    “Different strokes for different folks.” This saying speaks to the fact that everyone values things differently, and everyone has different beliefs about what is important (or not).”
    To me, this is so valuable to remember – no matter what you are doing. Our perspectives and background ‘color’ much of what we think, say, and do. Recognize that and really listen to the concerns and issues being discussed.

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