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<\/p>\nI\u2019ve spent the better portion of my life, over 40 years, in high-achievement mode. I\u2019ve definitely been trained to prepare, think, be logical, and fight. I’ve been the warrior, ready to do whatever it takes. Yet, the more I learn about the Wizard in me, the more I learn about being in the present moment, and the better I do. Now, I have less stress and negative thoughts than I ever had before. While difficult, many people have gone through a similar journey, and it all starts with a single, stressful breaking point that pushes people to finally ask, “How to love yourself?”<\/p>\n
Being committed to success is one thing, but it isn\u2019t your life. If it is your life, you\u2019ve got a big problem because what if you\u2019re not as successful as you\u2019d like to be? If you want to learn to love yourself, you’ll need to learn how to find worth, a healthy self-esteem, and a positive self-image outside of traditional success.<\/p>\n
Let me tell you that after over 40 years \u2014 and being successful for 30 of those years \u2014 I know the difference in the mistakes I made before when I was broke, versus how I am now. Now I’m a lot richer, a lot happier, and have a lot more self-love.<\/p>\n
Yes, being committed is helpful. Doing whatever it takes is helpful, but equating these pursuits to your life esteem, self-worth, or worthiness is not appropriate, and that\u2019s what I was doing.<\/p>\n
Life is life, and you need to be grateful for every moment that you have, whether you\u2019re ultra-successful, moderately successful, a little successful, or not very successful at all. You need to be grateful for the breath that you\u2019re getting.<\/p>\n
When you\u2019re grateful and happy with where you are in life \u2014 no matter your level of success \u2014 you will emit and express an energy of happiness. That\u2019s a high energy feeling, and people will want to be around you because it feels good. When you’re grateful, you attract people toward you, which will in turn help you financially.<\/p>\n
Money is challenging to get when you\u2019re a jerk. Money is challenging to get when you\u2019re in fear. Most importantly, money is challenging to get when you\u2019re overly stressed, filled with negative thoughts, and preaching negative self-talk. Why? Because nobody wants to be around you.<\/p>\n
Today, I can smell these negative emotions on people because I\u2019m successful. I can smell the fear, the lack of confidence, and the lack of self-esteem. You\u2019re either attracting people, or you’re repelling them. It\u2019s one or the other, and too often it’s the latter.<\/p>\n
Maybe you\u2019re saying, \u201cHarv, you\u2019re talking to me. What should I do?\u201d<\/p>\n
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The first step in learning how to love yourself is learning how to make friends with yourself. Think about it. If you were in a relationship, or you had a friend that treated you the way that you treat you, you would never be their friend. If you had a friend that kept putting you down the way your mind does; a friend that kept on hurrying you, or a friend that kept looking for what was wrong with you, would you be their friend? NEVER.<\/p>\n
Instead, you would think this person was a jerk. But it\u2019s okay if you do it, right? No, it\u2019s not okay.<\/p>\n
The fact is most of us don\u2019t practice friendship with ourselves, especially not one that includes unconditional love.<\/p>\n
From here on in, put down the stick. Drop the whip. Whips don\u2019t work. Sticks don\u2019t work. Stop beating yourself up with what you think you should be like, could be like, or what it would be nice to be like. In conclusion, you have to drop all these expectations that you have of your life and be kind to yourself.<\/p>\n
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People say to me all of the time, \u201cHarv, how do I be successful?\u201d In return, I say, \u201cIf you want to be a success, then you need to feel like a success. You need to smell like a success.\u201d<\/p>\n
Making these changes doesn\u2019t mean a lot of money right this minute necessarily. It doesn\u2019t mean a perfect life right now. However, it does mean that you’re learning to love you, as you are right here and now. Say to yourself, “I\u2019m good. It\u2019s all good. Life is good. I appreciate life. I\u2019m grateful for it. I focus on the good in my life and not the bad.”<\/p>\n
No matter how long it takes, sincerely being your best friend is going to start to empower you. In turn, that empowerment is going to bring out an energy of success in your life. When you have that, new ideas, new people, and new opportunities will come to you.<\/p>\n
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