For a long time, I struggled with confidence in the face of my dreams. I wanted to become a successful entrepreneur so badly, but with every setback, my confidence crumbled, and it felt like I was getting further and further away from my goal.
Finally, I had a breakthrough. Let me teach you how to gain confidence today, so you can learn from my mistakes and realize your successes faster than me.
Understanding How to Gain Confidence and Achieve Success as an Entrepreneur
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My big mental enemy before I became what most people would call very, very successful was a lack of confidence. Even though outwardly I showed that I was confident, inside I was constantly asking myself, “What if this doesn’t work?”
This self-doubt was killing me, but I couldn’t help it. After all, logically, I couldn’t justify confidence in the face of all my untested or unsuccessful ideas. Why would I have confidence when nothing had worked yet? In fact, how could I have confidence when everything I touched turned to sh*t?
How to Gain Confidence | Learn to Trust
What I didn’t realize at the time was that I didn’t understand confidence. Now, I know confidence comes from trust. I mean that figuratively but also literally. In fact, the word confidence comes from the Latin word, Confidere, which means to trust. Who do you have to trust to achieve confidence? The answer is obvious, but you have to trust yourself — and trust only comes from experience. More specifically, positive experience.
In order to gain positive experiences, you have to do things over and over and over. While some of these first attempts may be negative experiences, you have to persevere. Continue to practice tasks until you’re not even thinking about it anymore. Continue until every time feels like validation.
My problem was I had a lot of negative experiences. This history is why I went into everything without a lot of confidence.
How to Gain Confidence | Start with Little Steps
Another part of my problem was that I was just focusing on the outcome. I couldn’t stop thinking about the long view, where I wanted to be. However, by doing that I was neglecting what was right ahead of me.
Now that I understand how to gain confidence, I know that it comes in little steps, little improvements. A little progress creates a lot of confidence. You don’t create confidence by winning the Super Bowl on day one. Instead, you create confidence by having a good practice. You create confidence by winning the next game.
Finally, you create confidence by having a small success in your life. Then another, and another, and being prepared to weather the inevitable setback.
Before, I was only looking at the Super Bowl. With that mindset, I didn’t allow myself any middle ground. I was either a millionaire or a failure. By believing that, I discredited the process of becoming a millionaire. I discounted the one, two, three, five, ten years it may take to become a millionaire.
You can’t only be happy and confident when you become a millionaire. If you’re waiting for that magic moment to feel good about yourself, you’re giving self-doubt room to grow and limit you. Additionally, you’re training yourself to feel unsuccessful all of the time. With this mindset, you’ll find it difficult to gain confidence even when you do become a millionaire. By that point, doubt will just be a habit.
How to Gain Confidence | Keep a Journal
I used to think my business was only a success if I was rich. What a crappy way to live that was. After all, success doesn’t come all at once. However, I never thought to count my little progress towards financial freedom as success.
It’d a difficult habit to break. Even when you try to praise yourself for your smaller steps, your monkey-mind is going to try to detract from that success. Its going to say, “Well, that wasn’t a big thing.”
When something like that happens, you have to draw from your higher self and say, “Thanks for sharing. That was big enough because this is my exercise in confidence.”
Remember, the exercise is not to do big things. The exercise is to be successful at little things.
In fact, an easy exercise I invite you to try is to start keeping a journal of daily small intentions you intend to manifest. Keep them small. For example, you could write, “Today I’m going to walk/run/jog X amount.”
After you’ve accomplished the task, come back to your journal and write, “Success.”
Now, let me tell you that when you write “Success,” your brain is going to try and tear that down by saying, “Why are you all excited by that? That was nothing. ” Don’t buy it. That’s our programmed brains telling us to play it safe. If you believe those thoughts, it’s almost guaranteed that you won’t be successful at anything.
Whenever your confidence feels low, look at the journal. All you’ll see are successes.
Now how can you say, “I’m not successful,” when all you see are successes? With this journal, you’re training your brain that you are successful — which means you’re increasing your confidence!
What finally helped you understand how to gain confidence? Tell us your journey…we want to hear from you!
For Your Freedom,