Avoid Self-Sabotage and Become Successful
If you’re not doing as well as you’d like to be doing, it’s likely you are trying to self-sabotage your success.
There’s only one thing that can make your success: you.
“No, Harv, you don’t understand. It’s my boss.” Forget about your boss. Your boss doesn’t run your life.
“You don’t understand. It’s my wife and my kids.” Forget about your wife and your kids. Well, no, actually, don’t do that, but you know what I mean. Rather, stop putting this on them. They don’t create your life. You do.
“You don’t understand. I come from ____.” Who cares where you come from? Where are you today? Where do you want to be tomorrow?
My friends…you create every minute of your life. It may not be exactly what you want, but that’s what you’re creating.
You’re creating it because that’s what you’ve always created. You’re good at it, so you create that. If you’re not rich, realize “I’m creating not rich for myself.” That means you’re self-sabotaging.
How You Block Yourself From Personal Success
Here’s the way I look at it. Imagine a stream. The stream goes from the mountains all the way down to the ocean. It would naturally be successful at getting to the ocean.
There’s only one problem. A huge log falls in the middle of the stream. It can’t get over the log. Little trickles are getting through, but that’s about it. Then other logs fall. Pretty soon the stream is completely redirected, and it’s not going where it’s supposed to go. It just dries up. Everything was perfect until the blockage came.
Without the blockage, every one of you is going to be successful. The reason you’re not as successful as you’d like to be, is because something is blocking you. That something is you.
What part of you is the only question we have to answer. How are you blocking yourself? How do you stop yourself from getting rich? How are you creating that?
I wish that somebody would have pulled me aside when I was 20 years old, shook me up and said, “You’re creating the problems you’ve got. It’s not them, it or that. It’s you. That means you have the power to un-create those and create something else.” When I learned that I truly created my life, I became free.
3 Ways To Self-Sabotage Personal Success
If you are sabotaging yourself, there are different payoffs. The most common are:
1. You remain a victim. Victims can’t succeed. If they succeed, they can’t be a good victim. This is their way of getting attention. There’s always something wrong. “Feel sorry for me.” That way, nothing can be expected of them, yet they get to enjoy the benefit of your pity, which then only reinforces the whole story.
2. If we don’t succeed, there aren’t a lot of expectations or responsibilities. I’ll put a spin on a decades-old Stan Lee comic book line: With great freedom comes great responsibility. If you want to be financially free, you gotta actually do what you say you’re going to do! You have to be accountable; to yourself and to others. What if we really succeed? How are we going to keep it up? Oh my god! That’s hard! What if people want things from you? When you decide that you are going to follow through on your commitments, and you do this consistently, that is the essence of spiritual maturity and a discipline for success.
3. Fatal Attraction. People fear success so irrationally, they imagine bad things happening instead of focusing on the key term here: success! “I don’t have to worry about people robbing me.” Seriously? Like you’re so important now that the criminal underworld has you in its clutches? Please! “I don’t have to have my friends saying, ‘Who the hell do you think you are?’” Other people’s approval is all of a sudden more important than the quality of your mental, emotional, and financial life?
Your mind is telling you the conditions as to why you are not successful. It’s all bullshit. Nothing is more important than succeeding with what you’ve got going right now.
What’s your payoff for not being rich right now? What do you get out of it?
Whatever that reason you keep telling yourself why you can’t be rich right now, ask yourself, “Is it true?”
Whatever you find, please share your truth with us. You aren’t alone in this. It’s one of the most simple yet profoundly important discoveries you can make on your path toward personal success. We want to hear from you!
For Your Freedom,
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The simple truth is I have been lying to myself stuck in self fear for whatever reason and not wanting the discipline to face the fear and change. It has been a life long pattern of letting them do it for me. A self sabotaging legacy that has run in my family pattern for years. Now I am finally realizing it and bing honest about it.
Thanks Have you are so honest I have made a decision to discipline myself.
Thanks for this! Just spent the last week helping my daughter through a life change and realizing the muscles in my bottom aren’t in as bad of shape as I thought lol. Moving items from a two story home into a one bedroom apt…sigh. ..my daughter has some cleansing to go through! My last Monday dental work became an issue at the end of a holiday weekend during it all with pain levels being intense. Instead of screaming and wanting to say this is just too much …I cannot handle all of this…I kept my resolve. I placed all the the pain and craziness as a test I needed to go through and I passed. This just made me even more determined to succeed knowing how much easier a life change or medical would be had finances been better. I kept reading during breaks and meditating. Now to go help with my daughters cleansing and new life. Namaste and much gratitude for the learning.
Thanks for that, it’s very important. I could not locate what blocks me, but I know where to start
Very true, I have chosen a dangerous field and test it, by not being careful with phone calls and information. I realize that it is a type of sadism, I like people to sometimes fear me, I feel safe when they fear me. The issue is that when they become afraid they threaten, they are in a dynamic to overcome their fear. I need to follow a different practice that is safer than undercover work.
I allow my husband’s ill health, lack of energy, therefore disorder, and attitude toward the very rich get in my way, from being more self disciplined in my life. I basically put him and his needs and attitudes first. He has a need to talk, to share his ideas, and I am a captive audience. I do it for his self-worth, as I know how he has struggled in the past to get where he got, despite longstanding conditions that the Drs have no answer to.. Things we have found that help, e.g. food intollerances, we searched for and tried ourselves, and we are still searching as we have not cracked it yet. But my financial success is on the back burner, and therefore ours, as he is retired now.. Now we are having to downsize to a 1/3 of our accumulated possessions, mostly our varied interests that we have valued. I am doing the major heavy work e.g. in the garden, time lost trying to sell things off (people not keeping commitments) , plus the general maintenance, while he sorts through his 100000’s of slides, photos etc. that were intended for lecturing purposes, then the internet came along. Modern changes have surpassed our electronic skills and know-how. But he still feels he wants to contribute to society with his experiences and knowledge. I now skip the majority of emails and concentrate on the required sale of our property for the best price possible., within the next few months. Of course life would be better if we had a stable income. Prices in Australia are 10X that in my home country,, so that our pension doesn’t go far. Thanks for the push to intensify my commitment and strengthen my resolve and discipline in doing what needs doing. Thanks.
For me, it is my relationship to money and more so to success. Also I note within myself it is my fear of the unknown and fear of failure. There are many self-doubts that I exhibit these days, together with a lack of discipline and commitment. One of the most pertinent things that I have been avoiding is to identify my reason for wealth, as my personal reason (driven by truth and belief) will empower me to take action
I’ve been a victim many times in my life, I didn’t ask for it, I am a minority and minorities are often victims because that is the way life is. I get more attention than others perhaps because of my looks, I have been assaulted as a child, therefore I am vulnerable to predators. It is not my fault. Not all victims become a victim or set themselves up, there are more predators out there than there used to be. I cannot agree, as blaming the victim is a dangerous state of mind. I am an “over -comer” and a survivor, I am proud that I have recovered and I cannot stop if someone in their hate attacks me again.
Gracias T.Harv